Tamil matrimony customs are typically a conservative and very traditional affair. Each Tamil community have different custom of wedding, though the main events in the wedding do not change much. Weddings these days are becoming brief and there is no exception in our Tamil matrimony Customs. The old Tamil matrimony customs are still followed in most of the Tamil weddings. Marriage halls have taken over homes and guest list are shortened. Weddings takes place the whole year except for the months of Aadi, Margali and Puratasi according to Hindu calendar. Although the latest trends have changed the equation of arranged marriage in Tamil society, still arranged marriage is taking its own shape.
The Ponnu Parkal is the first event of the Tamil Matrimony customs i.e. The Bride seeing Ceremony is the beginning event and it took place at the Brides Home. In this event the bride will be asked to serve food and Coffee to the Groom and his parents. In this occasion the boy will be asked to see the Girl and if the Boy likes the Girl then the next proceeding for the marriage will be started.
The next step in the Tamil Matrimony Customs is the Nitchiyathartham or Engagement. This is arranged by the Grooms Parents. The Grooms parents with all their relatives will go to the bride’s residence to engage the bride for their son. During this occasion the Tamil Bride and Tamil Groom will exchange rings. In this ceremony the Grooms family will bring a seer consisting of fruits, dry fruits, coconuts, saree, blouse, bangles, mirror and other cosmetics for the bride. The bride dresses up in the clothes brought by the groom and the ceremony goes off in a simple manner. The elders decide the various options for the wedding like the gold to be given to the groom and other seer to be given to the in laws house. This tradition is followed for years and years in our Tamil Matrimony Customs.
Wedding is the next ceremony to be followed. A traditional custom known as Mapillai Alaiphu is conducted on the previous day evening of the wedding. On this occasion the Groom will be taken to the kalyanamadapam from the nearest temple with Mela thalam as Urvalam. This is a Grand ceremony conducted in each and every Hindu wedding. This is followed by the wedding reception with Music organized by leading Orchestra. Sometimes the Engagement or the Nitchiyathartham took place on this day.
The next day is the main event the Wedding or Muhurtham took place. The Bride and the Groom will be dressed with the new dresses take for the wedding. The Groom will be taken first to the Muhurthamedai to respect his parents with a patha poojai later the bride will be taken to the Muhurthamedai to respect his parents with a patha poojai . Then the groom ties the Thali tied on a yellow thread or thread dipped in turmeric to the bride’s neck. There are three knots the Thali which symbolizes the brides bonding to her husband, her new family and the relatives. The groom ties only the groom’s sister ties the first knot, the rest of the knots.
After the marriage, ceremony is the Nagavalli where the bride and the groom have to play some games depicting their family life. The young girls in the family enjoy these ceremonies thoroughly. The girl is then taken to the groom’s house at an auspicious time. Before entering her new house an aarti is taken to ward of the evils.
In her new home, the girl is asked to light the lamp in the pooja room to mark the beginning of a new life.
Thus the Tamil Matrimony Customs comes to an end. Even though our Tamil marriage is an arranged marriage all this Tamil matrimony customs makes it a great success to lead a happy and a prosperous married Life.